Alas, bodies
Oct. 11th, 2024 09:59 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
dismallyorientedFeels bad having to cw for menstruation when it's like. Just a normal bodily process and I think one that society could do more to talk about regularly. But yknow, I wanna be mindful about the ways other people's dysphoria manifests.
Anyway I think I may have cursed myself. On Wednesday I went to Planned Parenthood for an HRT checkup, and told them my period had stopped entirely, between both T and my nexplanon implant. Then yesterday I ended up having an extended talk with some younger queer folks about tampons and menstruation and dysphoria relating to sex & uteruses.
And then. This morning. Blood on the toilet paper and cramping in my abs. Thanks body. Doing me a real solid here, ha.
I'll be alright but it's always a bit of a dysphoric bummer when it recurs unexpectedly. I'm hoping it'll stay gone for the most part, especially after it was gone for about 6 weeks before? I should probably actually go back to tracking my cycle, to see when it happens and know for sure how much time has elapsed. Deleted all my previous tracked data from the app I used when Roe v Wade got overturned, cuz I was in Alabama at the time. But it probably won't kill me to pick it up again, here and now in Virginia.
The scientist in me is sad for the loss of data. But keeping track of all of it doesn't really affect me in my life now. Maybe trying to eliminate my period will finally push me onto injections. We shall see.
Anyway I think I may have cursed myself. On Wednesday I went to Planned Parenthood for an HRT checkup, and told them my period had stopped entirely, between both T and my nexplanon implant. Then yesterday I ended up having an extended talk with some younger queer folks about tampons and menstruation and dysphoria relating to sex & uteruses.
And then. This morning. Blood on the toilet paper and cramping in my abs. Thanks body. Doing me a real solid here, ha.
I'll be alright but it's always a bit of a dysphoric bummer when it recurs unexpectedly. I'm hoping it'll stay gone for the most part, especially after it was gone for about 6 weeks before? I should probably actually go back to tracking my cycle, to see when it happens and know for sure how much time has elapsed. Deleted all my previous tracked data from the app I used when Roe v Wade got overturned, cuz I was in Alabama at the time. But it probably won't kill me to pick it up again, here and now in Virginia.
The scientist in me is sad for the loss of data. But keeping track of all of it doesn't really affect me in my life now. Maybe trying to eliminate my period will finally push me onto injections. We shall see.
Re: Love to put the men in menstruation
Date: 2024-10-13 04:07 am (UTC)Yeah, I figured I wasn't exactly going to be able to talk you out of dysphoria with a comment on a post. That'd be quite the accomplishment, and... well, frankly, I don't think I have that level of rhetorical persuasion. I just wanted to offer what I could in the off-chance it helped some, and I'm glad it at least let you know that someone else out there is sympathetic and hopes you get to a more positive place soon.
My partner is the same way. Wanted to try, so I got a spare needle and an orange - which was how I practiced it in the first place before giving myself my shot in my leg. She couldn't even do the orange, actually. No needle-phobia, it's just the idea of stabbing me with something... which... fair. 🤷
And I totally get not wanting to do that on a ship. Stable positioning is a must. Very reasonable to stick with the gel given the circumstances, especially since testosterone is a controlled substance and thus providers are very reticent on prescribing more than the absolute minimum by my experience. "I need injectable testosterone for the times that I can get shots, and gel for the times I can't" seems likely not to succeed as an ask. 😑